8 ways to encourage a friend.

  1. Take a picture (of your friend, of the two of you, of a cow, of a sign). Print it out (snapfish, flickr, walgreens, your own printer). Write a note telling them specifically how they are making a difference in lives. Mail it to them.
  2. When they are in the middle of a busy day, send them a text.
  3. Remember their birthday (Facebook, your birthday email from last year).
  4. Take five minutes and make a mindmap.
    Here’s what that is: Put their name in the middle of a piece of paper. Around it make 5 lists: odd things they do; ways they care about others; objects or activities they love most; things THEY want to do better (NOT what YOU want them to do better); people who speak well of them. Put this paper next to your computer and include items from it in your notes and emails and conversations with them. (It tells them you thought about them).
  5. Gossip good about them to a mutual friend.
  6. Forgive them (don’t tell them about it, just forgive them).
  7. Reply to their emails, even if just to acknowledge receipt.
  8. Never assume they know you care.

For other 8 ways posts, go to the 8 ways page.

32 responses to “8 ways to encourage a friend.

  1. Send someone a quiet note to say you enjoy seeing their photographs. Boy, that one’s powerful.

    You’re a star 🙂


  2. I love this post! I am going to do some of these starting today.

  3. and of course offer to buy them a cup of coffee when you next meet face to face!

  4. michellezamora

    Thankyou for helping me smile today…… I am off to print off some photos now and tell a few of my friends how wonderful they are. It really has been too long.

  5. Jon – this is a first for me. Can I copy this post and give you credit on my Girlfriendology blog? Your list is a great reminder of friendship and making your friends feel special/loved. Please???? Thanks, Debba / Girlfriendology

  6. This use of mindmaps to aid in encouraging a friend is interesting. Thanks for the ideas.

  7. Great post! Yes, we all need more of this! GOOD JOB! Good pic!

  8. Joanna -that works? Cool!

    Kevin – just do one. And then another. and then another.

    Darren – or send them a coffee gift card and an appointment. But if I see you–i’ll take it with a little cream.

    Michelle – Yes!

    Debba – absolutely. Copy away.

  9. This so wonderful! Thanks so much for the post and all the good energy you’re spreading in the world!

  10. Roger – I just started using mindmaps a couple years ago. Officially. But as an analytical tool for my heart? Great!

    Jon – you do this yourself. I know you do.

    Kim – Thanks. Oh, and the picture is about the subjects!

    Lacajag – thanks for stopping by.

  11. What an awesome, awesome post. I will put these into action beginning today. Thank you!

  12. Jon, Dare I say you are getting more and more practical in your maturing season of life? (That is compliment, My Friend, just in case it wasn’t obvious.) “Mind maps as an analytical tool for my heart”…way cool!

  13. I was wondering, could you do all (or most) of that without needing a list?

  14. Thanks for this Chris. You hit a note in me that needed hitting.

  15. Awesome! Great pearls of wisdom – and so simple…

  16. thanks lara, you already started.

    Amy- some days it works.

    Nahum – that’s a great question. I need reminders. I am scattered and forgetful, even when at my best. So even a list of ways to think about thinking about people helps me. Thus, for example, the discipline of thinking about someone else, seriously thinking about them, helps me focus.

    Oh, and I don’t claim originality. But a list like the 8 ways, may add something to someone’s life that they forgot about.

    Shel, thanks for stopping by. thanks for following Chris.

  17. oh my gosh that photo is a hoot!!!!

  18. ken – simple is what I try for.

    kat – a reminder to be careful what you let your face do. And evidence of what friends mean.

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  20. I wish we’d gotten a group photo.

  21. photoshop time, Meg.

  22. you are a lovely man.

  23. Hi Jon, what a great post. I would love to share with you and if possible ask you share with others what we are doing here in Australia. We have just started an encouragement website with a vision of connecting a network of people together who once or twice a month will encourage someone. We send out a prompt with some ideas on who and how to encourage. That would be great if you could help up find members as this is what God would want us to do. Have a blessed day. Julia http://www.theencouragementfoundation.com.au

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  25. Just read about your link in Patti Digh’s blog. Your fantastic, yet simple tips are wonderful and have taken care of how to make my girlfriend’s birthday week/party/emails special as well taken care of how to make everyone I know really know how much they mean to me.
    Thanks so much.

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  29. Great Blog!
    Wonderful Ideas. 😀

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